I tried to explain to my wife that I was insane. She was unconvinced. That’s when I realized that anyone who would marry me was also, uh, not quite right upstairs.

It’s rare that you get a glimpse of one’s effect on others, especially others that one respects, others whose opinion you find valuable, both materially and spiritually.

It is, therefore, very distressing to catch them in the act of gnawing off an arm to escape from one’s company. Any excuse will do.